Wednesday, January 31, 2007

San Antonio Rose



My grandma was a very big Bob Wills and the Texas Playboys fan. San Antonio Rose was one of her favorites. It was played at her funeral, although at a much slower tempo- it almost sounded like a hymn. It's been 29 years today since she's been gone, and I miss her still.

I Sense the Apocalypse

My husband is a Packer fan; regardless, this is one mixed marriage that seems to work. He is also the Bingo chairman for our VF*n*W post, and one of his duties is to get raffle prizes every week. You can imagine my surprise when I came home to Bear Super Bowl stuff all over the coffee table last night.

RM: What's with all this??
OS: It's for raffles on Wednesday.
RM: You. Bought. Bears. Stuff?
OS: Well hell yes.
OS: I, uh, want the Bears to win.
OS: And everybody will spend money to get in on this stuff.

In other news, pigs were seen flying over the frozen slopes of Hell.

Mother of the Year

Well, maybe at least one person thinks so.

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You're welcome!

Wednesday Bears Trivia

In the 1940 NFL Championship game, Chicago Bear end Dick Plasman was the last player to ever do ...what?

Wet Sox

Last night...coming out of the bathroom...

Raging Mom: EWWW!!
Old Sarge: What's wrong?
RM: The floor is soaked in there. (peeling off socks)
OS: Oh, I'm sorry, that must be from my work boots.

This morning...

RM: EWWW!!
OS: Now what's the matter?
RM: Unless you got your work boots in places I can hardly get the Dirt Devil, we have a leak.
OS: Fuck!

Curiously enough, this post is not about Da Bears.

Tuesday Bonus Round

Two Chicago Bears players went on after retirement to pro wrestling careers.

Who were they?

UPDATE: Here's a hint:

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Tuesday, January 30, 2007

On Fire!

Matt at Blackfive is one of the blogs I check in on several times a day. And today exemplifies why that is ALWAYS worth the time with this:

And so far, all of our “games” have been “away games,” and I don’t know about the ignorant, treasonous Democrats and the completely insane radical leftists and their thoughts on the matter, but I would like to keep our road game schedule.

and this:

...If Americans really wanted to know their Army, American kids would be swapping trading cards of the battalion commanders and command sergeant majors, company commanders and 1st sergeants, and those legions of unknown squad-leaders who earn three Purple Hearts and decorations for valor before they are old enough to rent cars back home.

and this:

"If they're gonna support us, support us all the way."

and this:


We have, frankly, talked with the president some about maybe changing his message," Conway said. "You know, after 9/11 he said the best thing you can do, America, is live your lives normal. . . . And we think today that it may be time to rally the country to war."

IMHO, four of the best reads out there today.

Tuesday Bears Trivia

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NFL Defensive Player of the Year in 1985 & 1988.

10 Solo tackles and 10 assists against Denver in 1990.

Perfected the I'm-so-crazy-I-will-rip-your-head-off stare that made many a quarterback soil himself.

Monday, January 29, 2007

Bears Trivia

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"I wouldn't ever set out to hurt anyone deliberately unless it was, you know, important —like a league game or something."

Who said it and how many career touchdowns did he have?

Thursday, January 25, 2007

The Princess Birthday

Twenty Four Years! Dear Lord, can it be that long ago?

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Happy Birthday,Princess!

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May your day be filled with happiness, light, and well behaved little humanoids.

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Stranger Than Fiction

Well, this is certainly interesting news.

Fart trapping underwear??

This could change our whole family dynamic! What would we have to talk about during the holidays?

From the testimonials:

"I am a circus performer and for years I have been embarrassed to pass gas on stage. People in the audience sometime thinks its part of the act but it isn't. Because of your wonderful product today my audience laughs at my gags and not my gas." P. Maher, October 7, 2002

I think we would have to pass on this. Discussions of foulness, timbre, probability of-ahem-precipitation, windage and elevation are what keeps this family together. I can’t imagine a night going by without Old Sarge sitting in his recliner exhibiting his most excellent sphincter control.

h/t to SondraK.

Just "Plane" Wrong

Okay , this article has me fairly engaged today.

The parents can’t get their three year old daughter to sit in her seat after 15 minutes of trying, delaying the plane. The parents claim:

“We weren't given an opportunity to hold her, console her or anything.”

It seems to me that you had at least fifteen minutes to do that. But I guess maybe it IS a little hard to console a child if you plain can’t get to her.

“She was removed because "she was climbing under the seat and hitting the parents and wouldn't get in her seat" during boarding”, according to the airlines.

Personally, I think Air Tran was justified in removing the child from the plane. Obviously, the parents have no control over this child’s behavior if she can’t understand by some action or tone of voice that the time to quit screwing around is NOW, get in your seat.

Now, I’m not saying that my children aren’t capable of throwing a fit on a plane. Since my youngest turns 24 tomorrow, I’m kinda not too worried about it. But you folks with young kids- do you think this was too harsh?

I'm just thinking an ass whopping and some duct tape would have done wonders.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Danimal

Yep, it’ll probably be All Bears, All The Time for the next two weeks. Please excuse me and allow me my few moments of glory before The Beloved get their asses handed to them.
I have always been a Bears fan. But my fanhood increased exponentially in 1982, when the Bears came to Arizona. At the time, Papa Bear George Halas was wintering in Paradise Valley and wanted to see how the team was shaping up, so he flew them out to have a look. I had just had Young Sgt a few months earlier, and it was a treat to get out of the house and go see the Bears practice at Sun Devil Stadium.

I saw Gary Fencik. Doug Plank. Sweetness himself. Oh my God, I was in heaven!

And then, in the end zone giving an interview, was Danimal.

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I thought he was the biggest, most arrogant SOB I had ever seen.

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And of course, promptly fell in lust.

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I mean, for the love of all that is holy, THIS is a MAN! It nearly broke my heart when he retired in ’90.

Seasons come, season go. But for me, Dan Hampton is still my all time favorite Bear.

Would You Stop?

Or...Why I Will Never Own A Car Again.

The roads were horrible this morning- wasn’t really expecting that! I knew the wind had picked up last night, but surely did not think the roads would drift so badly, I was nearly halfway to work, twenty miles of not knowing where the center line or the shoulder was, when I see flashers come on ahead of me. In the ditch.

Shit. No one is stopping.

I drove past to the next available road to turn around and go back to the car. The ditch is pretty deep right there, and that poor little car was buried, the front end all crunched up. The girl driving was shook up, but okay. I stayed until the County got there and a tow truck was on the way. And not one other car stopped to see if she was okay or if they could help.

Now, is this just me feeling WAY too cocky with my 4WD Exploder, or do people honestly not give a damn anymore? I don’t stop for every motorist I see, especially if it is an able bodied man. But in a situation when there is damage? Or an elderly person? Maybe I’m nuts, but it seems to me that the right thing to do is offer assistance if you are able.

What do YOU think?

Monday, January 22, 2007

Blast From the Past



This is the first time I've done video- keep your fingers crossed!

Yes, I had the album.

Game Conversation

Raging Mom: So, where are you watching the game?
The Princess: At my friend's, she teaches with me.
TP: She's an Illinoisian too.
RM: No, it's Illinoisan. Ill-a-noy-an.
TP: Well mother, YOU certainly put the "annoy" in Illinois.

Well said!

Da Bears!

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Holy shit, we're goin' to the Super Bowl!

I will be doing my happy dance just as soon as I quit burping up bourbon this morning.

Friday, January 19, 2007

Hey Princess!

IF YOU CAN READ THIS

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THANK A MUSIC TEACHER!


That's for you, honey!

Oooooo!

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Look what I found at Menard's last night!

The Tinkerbell room is nearing completion. The floor problem is still unresolved, so for now I bought some inexpensive big area rugs to cover up the tarred floorboards. I hope The Heiress likes it.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Weird Happenings

I don't know if I believe in things like this, but...

Last night I woke up at 11:30. Not the oh-please-let-me-fall-right-back-to-sleep-i'm-so-tired wake up, I mean wide awake, and restless. I never got back to sleep. And yes, I am uber crabby today.

My dad called me this morning. This is strange in itself, because Dad is extremely hard of hearing and doesn't use the phone very much anymore. He was calling from my mom's doctor's office. She had a heart spell again last night at 11:30 and it scared her enough to get it checked out.

Maybe it's just a coincidence.

Hmmm....

In light of Tammi’s good news yesterday, do you think this is true?

Do taller people earn bigger paychecks?

Monday, January 15, 2007

Ice Blogging

Found over at Tammi's:

Your Political Profile:
Overall: 100% Conservative, 0% Liberal
Social Issues: 100% Conservative, 0% Liberal
Personal Responsibility: 100% Conservative, 0% Liberal
Fiscal Issues: 100% Conservative, 0% Liberal
Ethics: 100% Conservative, 0% Liberal
Defense and Crime: 100% Conservative, 0% Liberal


Playing hookey today. There is no one in the world important enough for me to drive 40 miles one way on a solid sheet of ice, put a 40 ton truck on the road on that same ice, just because they think they have to have stone today. Trust me, you do not. A hundred years from now it will not matter, and that's the gauge I'm working from today.

Drive carefully!

Friday, January 12, 2007

Desperation

It's not that I am so bereft of anything to say that I have to blog about what I had for dinner last night, fer pete's sake.

This Saturday I am the mistress of ceremonies for the 6th District's Voice of Democracy banquet. This is a pretty big undertaking, and since it is NOT being held at my VF*n*W post, I've had a bit of running to do. This all started back in November, lining up judges for the audio essay contest, detailing every part of the program as it needs to happen, invitations, decorations, awards, etc. I have finally gotten things ready enough that I just need to write checks and worry if I have any pantyhose that are still serviceable.

VOD is a good program, don't get me wrong, but there are times when I felt if I NEVER had to listen to another undereducated adolescent spout their misstatements of historial fact or go off on tangents about teenage pregnancy when the subject matter was "Freedom's Challenge", it would be a good thing. When competing in a contest for scholarship money held by a veterans' organization, it might be a good idea to considerwho will be listening to your essay.

But at least someone else will have to do this next year.

Because I have been asked to be the chairman for the whole damned state.

Aside to Bou: Don't say it, please!

Dinner and a Movie

That seemed to be just the ticket last night. I had marinated chicken breasts in Cajun seasoning and made red beans and rice. Damn, it was delicious!
I had picked up a movie earlier in the week- Broken Bridges1 and it was a really nice feel good movie. Plus Toby Keith is just pure sexy.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Too Funny

The President apparently is at Ft. Benning today. My son, Young SGT, could’ve met him, but there were…complications.

Boss: SGT Preston, do you want to go meet the President?
Me: Yeah, that'd be cool.
B: You have to bring your wife.
M: (without thinking) Oh no no no. You dont want that. No. Definitely not.
B: Why? Your wife dont like Bush?
M: Um. She's German.
Office: (laughing) Never mind then.

Sorry, DIL, but that was funny.

In the same post, the boy has heard rumors that he will be part of that "surge" we keep hearing about. I watched the speech at the VF*nW with my friend The Mayor, but I am reserving judgement until I can read the transcript. We both agreed that Dick Durbin is a first class asshole and an embarrassment to the state. What a tool.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Young SGT

My son has also moved to Blogspot AND he has a house to sell.Just thought I would mention it since I have so many Georgia readers. (*cough*)

Stop by and say hello. He and the Frau are getting ready to move to Ft. Hood in the next few months, 3rd Armored Cavalry was it?

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Update on Soldier

Just in case anyone was wondering how the young man who wandered into our VF*n*W New Years Eve is doing...uh...well...I think he's grounded. Our Senior Vice Commander* got him home at 0500 the next morning, and his parents would appreciate it if he didn't associate with such reprobates for the remainder of his R & R. Ah well, faily first, you know.

*for those not acquainted with the chain of command in the VF*n*W, the Senior is in charge of the really BIG vice, not the piddlin' crap. If you want to be led astray, Rob's your man.

Monday, January 08, 2007

Disclaimer

Dear T1G,

It came to my attention in a roundabout way that Tammi may have been feeling some repercussions from this

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showing up, framed no less, at Fritz's.

This was entirely my idea.

And any rumors to the effect that Bonnie is planning on making a shrine out of it in the mens room is just that- rumor!

Blogroll Update

I have added two new names to my blogroll. Introducing....

Badger 6, currently on one of those extended desert vacation getaways. Because Tammi told me too!

The Princess, my daughter for real. She has had a blog on Live Journal for a long time, but most of her posts are locked. There is good reason for this.

Weekend Cleanup

I have complained long and loudly about the state of Jackass Acres. Son #2 left one God awful mess in the bedroom he and his bride occupied. Eldest Son, unfortunately, seems destined to have a revolving door in his room- here, not here, here, etc. I set about to reclaim the upstairs this weekend.
Son #2 left enough stuff for me to open an Army surplus store. Which would nicely compliment the Marine and Air Force "store" down the hall. I packed two sea bags full of uniforms, under armor, rain gear, cold weather gear, a camelback, THREE canteens- you get the idea. And picked up empty pop cans, glasses, Trojan wrappers. I am not pleased. The word has gone out to pick up the stuff or to the curb it goes. I started pulling up some of the fugliest linoleum known to mankind in the clear spaces. I swear, there is NO time in man's history that this could have been attractive flooring. Fortunately, it is coming up very easily. Unfortunately, it appears to have been tar papered on- the floor boards are black and sticky. I will resolve this dilemma at a later date as I transform this into the Tinkerbell room.
Inevitably, as I am moving some of Son #2's junk into Son #1's old room to accomodate this transformation, my Nextel rings.
Son #1: Hey Ma, whatcha doin'?
RM: Oh, cleaning upstairs, getting ready to redecorate the little bedroom.
Son #1: Oh! Well, uh, I was thinking I'd drop my old bed by.
RM: (crickets chirping)
Son #1: That okay?
RM: Break up again?
Son #1: Well, yeah, long story.
RM: Hey no problem!!

So...junk goes back OUT, I clean out several dresser drawers to put away the clothes that are still there (on the floor) from the last time, haul the twin bed mattress and boxsprings into my bathroom (thank goodness it is a huge room) to make way for his bed, dust, vaccuum, and look over at the computer desk with despair.
I do not use this computer. Old Sarge and Son #2 mainly use it, and apparently they have never seen a web page that they did not want to print out. Paper EVERYWHERE. I figured, fuck this, whatever is on the floor is fair game and filled a garbage bag full, plus, count 'em, 5 empty Coke cans, three McDonald's drink cups, Snickers wrappers and other assorted CRAP, plus a coffee cup with at least an inch worth of science experiment growing in it.

This is not the worst of it.

Inspired by my frenzied activity upstairs, Old Sarge decides to finally answer the question that has plagued us since we moved in- what IS behind all this hideous paneling. We have paneling in the living room, in the kitchen, even in the bathroom. It sucks, and I hate it.
Well, now we know. There is old lathe and plaster behind there. Kind of. In some places there is just lathe; the plaster is gone. I think the only thing holding up the remaining plaster is the 5 layers of old wallpaper. There is not one thing that can make this better- it all has to come down, right down to the studs, and be replaced with drywall. Crap.

I think I will post pictures along the way so that you can see the horror we will be living with. I have seen houses ready to be demolished that look better than ours right now.

Sunday, January 07, 2007

My Thought For The Day

If, after a session of marital bliss, your significant other rolls over and lets out a huge fart, you can assume that not only has romance left your relationship, it ran away at 90 miles per hour, screaming.

Friday, January 05, 2007

And Now...

A question for the guys. Well, sorta.

Would Glenmorangie Ten Year Old Highland Single Malt be a suitable thank you for changing my tire?

Late!!

I have never EVER been late for work. Until this morning. Oh-dark-thirty and I get a flat on one of the worst zoomie roads in Northern Illinois. My boss gets the Knight In Shining Armor award today. Or maybe a bottle of Grand Marnier is more in order.

Here's a question for the girls:

Does your knowledge of tire changing encompass just theory, or practice?

Because I gotta tell you, I never would have made it past breaking the nuts.

UPDATE: Maybe it's just Tammi's bad mojo rubbing off on me.

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Yeah Yeah Yeah....

Your Deadly Sins
Wrath: 60%
Envy: 20%
Greed: 20%
Gluttony: 0%
Lust: 0%
Pride: 0%
Sloth: 0%
Chance You'll Go to Hell: 14%
You will die, after conquering the world as an evil dictator.


Blah blah queen of all evil blah blah. Like I didn't know.

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Moderation? ME?

Old Sarge says I must rein in the spending for the little bedroom makeover.

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Fer crying out loud, how can you say no to Tinkerbell?

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Or a vanity that says "You are beautiful!" when you sit down to it?

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

2007's First Rant

I came to a horrible realization this weekend. The Long War is indeed just like Viet Nam.

Just not like I thought.

I had this brought to my attention twice. On Saturday, Old Sarge and I had gone shopping and decided to stop in at the Loves Park VFW. I’m in charge of a banquet taking place there on the 13th, and wanted to talk to my co-chairman about arrangements. Loves Park does raffles on Saturday, so we stayed awhile and chatted. Some guy, probably close to our age, came up to our table and my friend introduced us, telling the guy that we have kids in the Army (apparently he has a son in also). The guy got this stupid, drunken shit-eating grin on his face and proceeded to say that we must know, too, what a lying draft-dodging c**ks**cker our president is, and that we need to get the f**k out of the Middle East right now.

My husband knows the look that comes over me at times like that. Like my face just turned to stone and I stared straight ahead. It scares the bejebus out of him.

The best I can say is, there was no bloodshed.

See, I believe certain things, and I remember certain things, and I can’t be easily swayed. I DO know what cut and run meant for a whole generation of veterans over thirty years ago.

On Sunday night, we met friends at our own VFW for the New Years steak fry. As soon as we sat down, the Senior Vice-Commander came up and pointed out a young man to us.

Sr. Vice: See that kid over there? He’s on R & R right now. He went to the Dixon VFW and they wouldn’t let him in.
Old Sarge: They what?? Why?
SVC: They said he couldn’t come in because he wasn’t a member.
RM: Oh come on, Dixon post is open to the public!
(Most VFWs in our area are closed posts, but welcome veterans whether they are members or not)
SVC: I swear to God, they wouldn’t let him in!
OS: Who dropped the ball there on offering him membership? Jeez, I can’t believe this.
RM: So, what are we doing for him?
SVC: (smiling hugely) Well, so far he hasn’t paid for a drink. He’s getting a free steak dinner, a free membership and I’m either driving him home later or he’s staying with us.

I took $20 and told the bartender to give him drink chips for me. Later on, I had a chance to talk this young man- which wasn’t easy, EVERYONE wanted to shake his hand and even the older vets went out of their way to welcome him. I told him that if there was anything he or his buddies needed, just let us know. He smiled and said toothbrushes and clean white socks would be appreciated. And that this was the first time, in all of his deployments, that he had felt comfortable at home. I hope we can visit more while he is here.

So, yes, I believe things are looking quite the same as they did when Viet Nam was happening, but it wasn’t the soldiers’ fault then and it certainly isn’t their fault now. It is our media and our peers. Where I see someone that could be a son or daughter, they see a poor uneducated dupe not worthy of their time or respect.

I can’t change this for every kid coming home, I know that. But I can make sure it doesn’t happen in MY back yard.