Friday, June 19, 2009

I Wish I had a Monster Truck

What is it about a Prius that just makes me want to run it over??? Maybe it was the 10-miles-below-the-speed-limit thing, but I swear I really wanted to do damage.

And I should be grateful, actually.

Every person who drives a small car is probably saving enough fuel for me to drive my big SUV guilt-free. I have every intention of leaving this mortal coil knowing I used WAY more than my fair share of fossil fuels. I drive on average 1,000 miles a week and there is no way I am going to risk my neck in a tin can just for gas mileage.

But really, how fun would that be to just drive right over one of those little PC clown cars?

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

The House on the Corner

The saying goes that while there may not be much to see in a small town, what you hear makes up for it.

My neighbors proved that wrong this morning.

Now, I live in an old part of town, the "old money" higher property tax, etc. despite the fact that Jackass Acres strongly resembles Sanford & Son most days. The houses are pretty well maintained....except for mine.

I am driving down X street and see a huge sign on the corner " Kxx O'Bxxxx is 47!" And as you turn the corner there is a throne...a toilet throne, to be exact, with candy canes lining the walk, the birthday girl's name AND the age of her toilet proudly displayed on a pedestal.

I was so proud tha I damn near sobbed.

Something Different

Time for a change. Details soon!