The Nautical Chronicles

I mentioned a few weeks ago that we were buying a boat. My sister and her husband were upgrading, and this was something we could afford, plus hey! It’s our anniversary today!

Now to preface this story, my dad had a nice pontoon a few years ago, and he offered to let Old Sarge and I take it out one afternoon. Always grateful for a chance to get on the river, we took him up on it. We lug our coolers down to the dock and make ready to set sail. Except the damn thing will not start. No way, no how.

Flash Forward to the day we come up to Sissy’s to check out the boat. My brother-in-law has just had it out two days ago, and tries to start it for us. It doesn’t start. Nothing anyone does is doing any bit of good. They take it up to a boat repair place.

Then they invite us to go out on another sister’s pontoon, and again we pack coolers, fix snackies, etc. We get everything loaded on the pontoon and, you guessed it, it won’t start. We said fuck it, and sat on the pontoon for a few hours anyway. (and just so you KNOW what’s coming, when my other sister took the pontoon out next it started right up)

So my sister gets “our” boat back last week, and all I can think about is getting out on the river. We pack up the Exploder and haul the boat down to the ramp. Son #2 is backing the car down the ramp, the boat trailer getting deeper in the water, when I asked Old Sarge:

“Hey, isn’t the motor supposed to up?”
OS: “Shit! Son #2, pull the car up!”

So they pull the car up so that the motor won’t bottom out, and then back up again.

Me: “ I hate to sound like a worry wart, but is the plug in?”
OS: “Shit! Son#2, pull the car up!

Old Sarge gets the plug in, and they back up again. Old Sarge unhooks the boat from the trailer, set the motor down and….nothing. It won’t start. He tried for 10 minutes, and it just cranked.

So, since there were others waiting to use the ramp, we packed up and dropped the boat off my sister’s.

An hour later, my dad went over to my sister’s and tried to start the boat. The fucker fired right up.

Does anyone think we’re being sent a message loud and clear???